Hiccuping Hoya

Embrace life's hiccups

Trust Your Gut

As I wrap up my first stint in the corporate world, I’ve been doing a lot of meditating on what my next steps are and what I envision my life to be. When I left for the winter, I could feel myself physically rejecting my job. I was getting sick, lethargic yet had trouble sleeping, and gaining weight. As soon as I left, I immediately felt better and lost the weight. So, when I returned in March and fell right back into that pattern, and fell back into bad personal habits I used to deal with these other problems, I knew I needed to make a change.

So far, my gut hasn’t steered me wrong. It may seem really bizarre and not quite rational, but if you listen to your gut, you’ll probably make the right decision for you. Doing what is right for you versus what is right for someone else are two very different things.┬áIf I had listened to my conservative colleagues last summer, I would be twenty pounds heavier, depressed, and passionless. Instead, I lost the weight, discovered diving, and realized that life doesn’t have to be miserable. I’ve had enough close calls to know that life can end unexpectedly. I’ve been accused by those close to me of living too much in the moment, that soon the funds will dry up and I’ll look back and think I’ve wasted so much time.

An ancient building being subsumed by the jungle;
even so called permanent things change

I’m not concerned. I know I’m not alone in the world. If the worst happens and I can’t take care of myself, I have family and friends who will help me get back on my feet. I would do the same for them, and I hope they know that. Life is too short to not enjoy it, so once I walk out of my office for the last time today, I’m opening myself up to new adventures and not looking back.

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